Person: Can you tell me if my card is still valid?
Me: Yes, do you have your card with you?
Person: No.
Me : Then how can I tell if it is valid?
Me: Do you have any identification?
Person; No.
Me: What is your name?
Person: My name is x. But it could be under Y or Z or my partner's name W.
Person: My partner's aunt has a library card. Can I use that?
Me: Is she here now?
Person: No.
Me: Has she given you her card?
Person: No. But she wouldn't mind.
Me: Could you ask her and bring her card in?
Person: No, she is away on holidays.
AAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!
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